Alice in the Heart’s English Translation (Part 3)

We’re staying in the Hatter Mansion and attempting to date the other eligible bachelors in the Hatter Family Mafia. Unfortunately, the ones that are left have a bit of a creep factor to them. Still, in the interest of documenting each route’s translation…here we go.

The color of the text boxes denotes the person speaking:

• Pink: Alice is talking out loud
• Gold or Green: Alice is thinking to herself
• Blue: Someone else is talking to Alice

Bloody Twins’ Route

Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum are the lazy gatekeepers at the Hatter Mansion. Dee is in the blue clothes and is obsessed with relaxing, Dum is in the red clothes and is obsessed with making money. They both fall in love with Alice and attempt to share her as a girlfriend. Alice goes along with it only because the twins threaten to fight each other to the death otherwise (and they’re not joking).

(They call me "Sis" instead of "Alice".)

"He looks at me around my head, and the other looks me in the same way."

"A truly good thing is recognised its goodness by only the look!!!"

(What's the "snip" about?)

"He said it so freshly, really freshly"

(This "whole" is talked about a few times and it's never spelled right.)

(There's nothing too wrong with these sentences, I just thought they were funny.)

"I don't look so well." (Elliot was talking to Alice about her not looking well.)

"Do you have an eye on your back?"

"It's better to get lost and die, rather than to kill animals"

"Then we can literally share but ....., you will probably die, right? Will you die?"

"I have no idea how I can repair their brains."

"they were thinking about me until their heads explode"

"As if human ended up with non-human. It was just a series of a flow."

"Let me feel at ease if I take my eyes off."

"P.h.e.w. ..... . " (Alice didn't initiate or want this kiss.)

"When Blood clapped his hands, there was a machine sound like the clock hands standing straight up the time."

"I wasn't really sure what kind of things the twins did to make a food of him"

"What kind of good time can create a weird sound from another planet?!" (Okay, I put this one in here because it cracked me up.)

That was not an enjoyable route at all, I was too creeped out. Maybe I’ll have a better time with the Mafia’s boss?

Blood Dupre’s Route

Time to date the head of the Hatter Family Mafia. Blood looks exactly like Alice’s ex-boyfriend from the real world, so she already feels a little uneasy around him. Still thinking this is all a dream, she blames her subconscious. Blood is a manipulative creep. I got the “good” ending in this route and it’s the most disturbing thing ever.

(Blood is mistakenly called "Brad" a few times in the script.)

"That's sounds very scarily."

("You have a gut" written like this means "you're fat". Blood should have said "you have guts.")

"There's dim in my head."

"He talks this way like this. I'm scared hell out of him."

"Knock knock. Staying in my room, the door is knocked."

"Then, I peak at Blood working while I read. And now I'm still keep peaking him."

"The part, with respect raised my heat beats."

"How many times I see him. The more I see him, the more."

"..... If I had someone like that, I wouldn't let her go even if I had to loose both of my legs. I would swear to be gauged in my heart if I ever cheated."

"I fall myself. Just like needles do."

"I wish ...., you die a million times."

"Fu .... u." (he's laughing)

"..... Cuticle?"

"It makes your moth watered right?" (Chrome's enhanced spell check keeps wanting to fix all these errors I'm typing, lol)

"While we are having an endless quarrel, I struggle to pull my arm off."

Blood’s Proposal

Alice has the choice of going back to the real world or staying in Wonderland with Blood. On the literal cliff of reality, Blood rushes to her and proposes marriage, refusing to take “no” for an answer.

"If you stay here, I'll ..... . I don't mind taking the most complicated responsibility for men."

"I'm saying I can go to the grave of life with you!"

"If I had to marry you, I'd rather die!"

"If you don't marry me, I'll kill you!!"

The “Happy” Ending

Alice is forced to marry the boss of the mafia, a guy she hates. I don’t see how this can possibly be considered the good ending.

(Of course "gloom" should be "groom" here, but I'll let it slide because this is certainly a gloomy situation.)

"A bride who has to become defensive to her gloom. I never had a relief when I'm with him."

"I'm afraid that being with you, it ruins my life."

(..... I want a divorce.)

Well, that’s a bummer ending. Next update we get the heck out of the Hatter Mansion and attempt to date the sanest guy I can find: Julius the Clockmaker.